August 11, 2009

Ramblings of my sleepless night

My mind is racing with all the things that need to be done in the next few weeks. I should clarify that I have has a nice long vacation. I have visitied with family and friends, gone to the beach and amusement park (legoland), cleaned out my kitchen cabinets, my closet and have a healthy start of my craft room. Floors have been cleaned, beds moved. While my to do list has not been completed it has been worked on.

So you see I have had a productive summer.

I had a few more things planned. A buying trip to LA and a trip to the buying show which is in town this week (I didn't feel right leaving my kids after telling them their grandma had died) but, things change. Kent' s step mom passed away on Friday night and Life's responsibilities are more important. I also found out Friday I get to move my classroom (now, I'm not complaining about this, I'm moving out of the hall with all the loud 8th graders, I love to teach them but, their hallway behavior kills me). I am also in charge of our quarterly enrichment that will be next Tuesday night and Super Saturday that is in a month. I'm putting on a craft show/ open house with a friend. Oh did I mention I still have a family you know 2 kids, a husband, 3 dogs. I'm trying to be as helpful as possible with funeral arrangements and pack to leave soon. Probably in 28 hours from now. Plus I can't sleep! My mind is racing. So I'm here blogging a boring post but, maybe it will help me decompress. It's time to once again start my engines and get going. I'm a busy person. I stay busy if you my calendar is quite booked from now til Thanksgiving. I reserve December for me and my choice of fun activities. I guess it's only just begun.

I'm so thankful to believe Families are Forever. It made telling my children so much easier. Their simple faith is amazing. Hunter took the news well and accepts the fact that Grandma is in heaven with Heavenly Father. Rissa was sad and had engaged in some interesting questions.
* If Grandma is in Heaven, Where is Santa Clause?
* Can I take my blanket to Heaven?
* Is there food there?
* Did Grandma leave me a couch? (This comes from my mom telling the kids that she will give our couch back when she dies.)

This is one of my favorites
C: Mommy you'll dies someday and go to Heaven then it will be Daddy, Hunter and Me.
M: yes,
C: Daddy will die someday and then it will be Hunter and ME
M: yes
C: Hunter I love YOU-in a sweet voice.
H: Sister it's OK we all go live with Heavenly Father. His voice was so loving and concerned. Trying to assure her all would be well.

(secretly I'm just glad I get to be the first to die)

Hunter just wants to send Grandma a balloon up in the sky.

I feel so sad for my brother in law who is 14. His first day of High school was to be on Thursday instead he will be attending his mothers funeral. I remember his Kindergarten graduation. I can't believe he is going to High School.

Clarissa starts Kindergarten in a week and a half. I'm so excited for her to go to school. To learn and to make friends. I'm scared for her, scared people will be mean to her, scared she won't fit in. I think maybe some of my elementary school days are coming back. She's ready with lots of new clothes, a new hairstyle, new glasses and new shoes are coming. I've ordered pencils with her name on them. I'm scared I don't know what cool things to pack in her lunch either.

1 comment:

Julia said...

Oh Autumn, I'm so sorry for your loss. Please convey my sympathies to your husband too. My thoughts are with you.
And don't worry, no matter what you pack for lunch will be o.k. She'll want to buy lunch til she gets a taste of it...